Old People...j/k...Happy Day mom

Happy Birthday Mom! We have a quote framed in our kitchen by Abraham Lincoln that says, "All that I am or hope to be I owe to my mother." How true that statement really is. We just wanted to wish you the best birthday yet, and that we hope you have many more wonderful birthdays to come. Now on a more serious note, here are some things that make my mom unique:

-the spatula jig, when she gets a spatula in her hand she'll always end up doing a dance where she acts like she is going to hit you with it...while shifting side to side like a crab.

-the corpse, when you try to pick her up or tickle her, she stiffens her body so that you can't move her around as easy.

-the megaphone, that would be mom's mouth when she chews, spaghetti would even sound crunchy the way she eats. When she eats grape nuts you can hear her from upstairs.

-bony elbows, she uses to her advantage by any means necessary

-the crier, she has gotten out of some of the worst scenarios by crying (speeding tickets for example) and certain commercials do the trick, as well as any narrative with classical music.

-carbonated burps, need I say more?

One of my all time favorite mom memories:

My mom always leaves an open can of Diet Coke in the fridge. One day, I decided to pour tabasco sauce, mustard, ketchup, pickle juice and a few other yummy things in her can. She had just come in the door from a long day's work and I could tell that all she wanted was a big swig of her pop. I was sitting at the bar just watching and waiting innocently. Sure enough, she heads straight for the fridge...and takes one of the biggest gulps I have ever seen someone take, the gulp was so loud I could hear it as clear as day. By then my face was red and sweaty as I was trying to contain my burst of laughter a little bit longer. Then she looked at me with a look I will never forget and said in an almost eerie and calm tone, "That was NOT funny". She cruised over to the sink to get a drink of water, which of course I rigged as well (the old rubber band around the sprayer). The funniest thing about the next part was that when the water hit her shirt, she didn't jump out of the way, she just stood there as the water bounced off of her onto the floor. By then I was laughing so hard I began to choke, halfway realizing I needed to run away soon. She never did get me back even though she threatened me a few times...but then again, maybe she did and I just didn't know it. Happy Birthday Bly, you southern belle!

Good times, Bad times

I wish I could make this picture bigger so the facial expressions could do the pic more justice. This is in my all time, top 5 favorite photos as of this week. Joni's cousin Shon, who is now on a mission in Detroit, is holding a saw in his hand when they went "Clark Griswald" on a forest to cut down thier Christmas tree. Shon has a devilish look on his face and Andrea is completely unaware of the whole kodak moment to be. I laughed for at least 5 minutes straight and even peed a little bit...not in my pants. It is now a screen saver on our computer. My eyes are so tired right now I don't even know why I am blogging right now, but for some reason I just feel like it. I played guitar a little bit tonight for the first time in a LONG time, and my fingers are hurting now. You have to build up callusses on your fingers in order to play, and I definately don't have any of those right now, so it kinda hurts. Tonight a woman started screaming outside of our apartment, the kind of blood curdling scream that makes you know something is wrong. I went outside after some investigation from the window, and there were a ton of people outside who obviously heard the same thing. Turns out a woman was attacked right when she got out of her car and a man ran away with her purse. She was smart enough to start screaming right away, but the guy got away. We live in a gated community with security but there is a railroad track right by our house and I think someone hopped a fence. Not to sound negative or anything, but with my job getting more and more not fun, and Joni's internship getting longer by the day, along with the crime all around us, we want to leave Dallas as soon as time allows. I don't feel scared for myself but I constantly worry about Joni. We have a pretty good system between us to make sure she is safe, and she is a smart girl. It is important to be aware of surroundings no matter where you are. We only carry what we need in our wallets now.
Sunday was a day that I think was meant for us at church, so I am glad we were there to hear the messages. The talks were on teaching and raising special needs children. Despite the hardships, we have come to love all the kids in our class. Hannah, the little girl in the wheel chair, adores Joni. Every time we see her she gives us a big hug and gets all jumpy and excited. One of the kids parents came to us to thank us for being her son's teachers and that he always talked about what we did in class, which felt really good because we always wondered if we were getting anywhere with them. I had fun with Isaac too, the other autistic child, I find that sitting with him on the ground and giving him one on one attention keeps him more settled down. I taped his two pinky's together as a joke and he thought it was the funniest thing ever. Isn't it funny sometimes how things can seem so depressing and messed up, then when you find whatever it is that makes you happy it changes everything. I think everyone needs a place to "get away" in thier mind. Mine invloves being with kids, reading the latest sports updates, playing guitar, going to the movies, church, working out, milkshakes, laughing, and playing games. Some music and 80 degree days make me feel pretty good too. I think I would be embarassed if someone listened to some of the music that pumps me up, Rocky never fails man.

Cold feet lead to interesting work days

I just want everyone to know that I have officially "lost it". Either that or I really need this internship to be over A.S.A.P.

You are probably thinking I'm just exaggerating, but I will let you read what I did today and then you can tell me if I've got a few screws loose.

Okay so here's a little background:

I had to teach 2 1/2 hour diabetes meal planning class this morning. I also had 6 assignments/projects to be handed in today. Anyone who knows me knows I'm a bit of a perfectionist when it comes to things like this (mainly because we are evaluated on EVERY move we make in our rotations). So I stayed up super late on Valentines evening putting finishing touches on homework... I even planned out what I was going to wear to teach my class.

A little more background (I promise this is leading somewhere)

Our house gets really chilly at night. I always get dressed and then wear my oh-so-cute bright pink fuzzy slippers while I do my hair and make up.

I finished getting ready, gathered my stuff and headed out on the 20 minute drive to work ... forgetting one key element ... ... ... ...

I figured out right as people were starting to arrive to my class that something was not quit right... I FORGOT TO TAKE OFF MY OH-SO-CUTE PINK FUZZY SLIPPERS. Pretty professional looking, right?

I didn't have enough time to drive home so all I could do was belly laugh till I was blue in the face. Eventually we dug up a ratty old pair of black walking shoes that I ended up wearing the rest of the day.

The class ended up going just fine - once I contained my giggles.

I think I need a VACATION

Valentines and girls

I remember the good old days in elementary school when valentines day came around, and everyone gave out valentines to each other. I would always sneak in the candy hearts that had secret messages written on them...URAQT or I like you for that one girl...and "you are nice" for that other girl. It was cool because you could pick out the superman valentines cards because you liked them, not because you knew the girl would like it. When I got older and didn't care as much I stopped looking at the messages on the candy hearts and it got me in trouble a couple of times. I remember in the first grade I would eat glue to impress girls, and I was even brave enough to sit three of my crushes down at the same time during play time to tell them that I liked them all, but I liked them in a particular order...each for thier own reasons. I don't know if they liked me back though because I was the kid who wore the same pair of corduroy's for the entire year. It's funny how every grade there is a new crush, and I can remember thier full names and everything, but I couldn't tell you anything about fourth grade and up, it was all a blur. I think it is easy for kids to have so many crushes because almost all kids are cute in thier own way, but then we all hit this ugly stage at sometime in our lives and some of us never recover. I guess I am not talking about Valentines anymore but who ever said blogs had to make sense?
Joni was the cutest little kid EVER, not kidding, she was the curly haired fro blond girl with enough energy to ware any adult down. She claims to have had an ugly stage in junior high, but it served her well because all of the guys in her school that made fun of her in junior high wanted to ask her out in high school, and she promised herself she would never go out with any one of them...and she didn't. That's probably the coolest thing a girl can do when she looks "good" to the world, is deny those who didn't see who she really was. I am constantly reminded of a video I saw when Joni was a little kid and she had a bug in her hand, just curiously inspecting it, when her mom said, "Joni, don't eat that" and Joni replied, "but I want to", and stuffed it in her mouth. She hasn't changed much when it comes to life as an adult.
I am experiencing writers block and I can't write anymore right now...writer's block is wierd. That makes me mad because I was going somewhere with all of this, but the wheels were just spinning too fast. I think I need to learn to type faster so I don't keep doing this in blogs.

White Blur

There isn't any reason I am posting this picture, Joel sent it to me a long time ago and I just found it again. I call it the white blur. We were supposed to be taking pictures of the nieces and nephew jumping and watching thier facial expressions, but I couldn't just sit there and watch. Time seems to be a big white blur lately...I am sad to say I measure time by how often I pay the bills or the rent, and I have been doing that a lot lately so time must be flying by. Joni and I have known each other for over four years already, carter will be 4 soon, I have been home from Chile 6 years, and I have been in Texas of all places for 8 months. Maybe that explains me craving old school video games lately, I can't get the Mario music out of my head and I don't know if it ever will leave my head until I find somewhere to play it.

Last night Joni and I went to Walmart to buy a scale, some rubber gloves, and a gallon of milk...we always try to guess someone's life story by looking at what they buy, or how they act-it's a pretty fun game...I can only imagine how we are "classified" sometimes. Speaking of which, there really are a lot of crazy people here, I know I have said it a lot, but it is true. I was thinking last night how many kids I feel sorry for because if they become anything like thier parents than they are doomed. Seriously, it should be against the law for some people to have kids, and they are the ones who end up having ten kids. At this rate by the time I hit the half century mark I am going to go crazy with the number of insane people there are in the world. Maybe everyone else is normal and I am crazy. You never think of those in your "bubble" being crazy but who knows. All I am thinking is that kids deserve the right to grow up normal, learning to respect others and themselves, eating a proper diet, experiencing discipline etc etc. Then let them be free to choose how they live and hopefully they had a good enough upbringing to get them by. Some kids just don't get a good fair start...which explains all the bad drivers out there. I know it is the easiest thing in the world to be judgmental, especially with other people's kids, but come on. I wonder sometimes what kind of childhood George Bush had. Thanks mom and dad for doing your best, even though I am a bit messed up sometimes, you guys managed to do a pretty good job at the parenting thing. Thus concludes the most random blog I have ever written.

Healthy and Happy

This week I am at a dialysis center and let me tell you - I am so thankful for my health and the health of my family! Honestly, I have never seen so much blood in my life. Even though I knew the process it was quit shocking to see people with huge tubes (about the size of my finger) pumping blood from their artery into a machine. Most patients have no remaining kidney function, thus making no urine, thus not clearing ANY waste or fluid from their systems.

They have to be at the center 3-4 times each week for 4 hour sessions. Since no fluid is removed via urine the average water weight gain between visits (in 2 days) is 4-7 pounds! Talk about uncomfortable. They have to completely overhaul their diet and take a dozen medications that can cost ~$2,000 each per month. Not to mention the co-morbidities most patients have such as diabetes, HIV, hypertention, congestive heart failure... you name it - the list goes on.


I'm sure I will continue to feel thankful for my health as my next rotations are at gastric bypass, diabetes, cardiovascular rehab, trauma/ICU, diabetes and liver transplant. I am learning a lot about not only the human body, but about people. I've decided that every patient needs (and more importantly, deserves) a person who see's them as a person, not a disease. It's amazing to see how much a genuine smile and a little listening can make someones day. Especially patients who beginning to feel like a number in the system.

Anyways... I just wanted to say that I am definately counting my blessings. I never want to take my health for granted again. Love you all!



JONI

Renewed

Another interesting day at church today, I think Isaac (the severely autistic kid) didn't take his meds today. It is truly a workout to keep track of him. I am getting pretty good practice with my reflexes, every time he jumps up to run away I grab him before he takes two steps and sit him back down. I am learning that you can only use one or two words to tell him what to do, but I still need to figure out the spitting and flailing arms thing. My most used words with him are "sit, reverent, sing, quiet, bad, color and Jesus" Every time I use one of them he likes to repeat it as loud as he can. I have found that when I sing the primary song in his ear he settles down long enough to try and repeat me, then he goes crazy when it is done. I wasn't the only one with troubles today, Joni and I found out that Hannah( the mentally handicapped girl in the wheelchair) is learning to walk (I never knew she could). Her mom let her out of her chair and she turned into a little monkey crawling and walking everywhere with Joni following her every move. Believe it or not we survived, Joni taught the lesson while avoiding getting her eye poked out by a marker from Isaac, and I kept the kid from sticking his fingers in the socket and harming anyone else. The funny thing is when we are done and on our way home, we feel like we need to disinfect our clothes and hands from all of the craziness and spit and boogers and whatever else we came into contact with. Isaac thought it was hilarious that he had horrible gas today too. I guess I will never understand what parents go through when raising a kid until we have some of our own. In the mean time this calling is great birth control.
Joni and I have decided on Texas A&M. When we talked about the positives and negatives it was pretty one sided except for the desire to be near everyone. Hopefully someday soon we will be in a position to choose to be closer to everyone, but until then we feel it is the smartest decision for us and most importantly the right one.
Getting accepted into A&M has been a huge boost to my confidence. I admit it is a partially a pride thing, but I have found a renewed energy to be better on all fronts. Joni thinks that we somehow switched places because I asked her if she wanted to go to the mall last night to spend some Christmas money, and I have wanted to workout more often. I bought a couple of ties and a new shirt, even though it took me almost an hour to talk myself into buying them. I couldn't help but laugh because I get totally lost in the mall, and Joni knows her way around even though she hardly goes there. But then we go outside and Joni doesn't know north from south but I know what I am doing on the roads. Hope everyone is doing well, these blogs are a great way to feel closer to everyone, keep 'em coming.

WOO HOO

You are probably wondering why this big picture of Texas A&M is on our blog...but if you know me at all or ever talk to me than you have probably already figured it out. I got accepted into the Masters of Science in Human Resource Management program at TAMU. At first it didn't seem real. Joni was jumping up and down and I was just standing there with my mouth open, but now the excitement of the whole thing has gotten to me. Joni and I will not make a decision right now, because I want to make a smart decision, not an emotional one. But to be honest, something pretty big has to happen to make us not go. If we go to College Station we will continue our adventure in Texas in a small town which will be refreshing. If you like statistics I would say 80% College Station, 20% returning to Logan, but you never know with us. We are having another "artic blast" this weekend. I am laughing because on the news right now they are interviewing people at the supermarket who are buying as much food as they can in case they get stuck in thier homes for several days. I can't get over how rediculous these "storms" are here. Actually tonight I drove home in a monsoon of rain...2 inches in 2 hours. My wipers were on high speed and I still couldn't see, and because it is so flat, you have to drive down the middle lane or get swamped by water. Anyways, I was reminded again today of how lucky I am to be where I am and to have family that I love and who support me, and also have such an awesome wife. I thought it was cool how excited Joni was for me when I opened the letter, she is so genuine. I will never forget when I proposed to her and she didn't even look at the ring. She was so excited and filled with emotion and didn't care about it until I forced her to look at it. So I guess you could say I feel pretty good today. Whatever happens, I am an Aggie for life. Now I need to eat the pumpkin pie that Joni made for me!

I had no idea

I found out two things about Joni this last week that I might never have known if I hadn't slept light for some reason. I always sleep like a log and nothing can wake me up until I am ready to wake up...unless I really have to go to the bathroom of course. Before you start worrying about me having bladder problems, I have been drinking an obscene amount of water lately as well as eating like a champ so that my mom doesn't tell me I look like I am sickly...after I had the worst flu I can remember having in years on Christmas. Anyways, so I found out that Joni sticks her ice cold feet on my back while I am asleep. While I am thinking this could be the most cruel thing I have been unaware of since we have been married, all of you women out there are probably thinking...yeah, so?. Cold hands and feet on back is a practice that needs to stop. I bought Joni these really cool instant warming packets a couple of Christmas' ago that have been used once or twice and are now in our drawer of memories and trinckets that we never open. I have learned that women experience cold hands and feet because of something to do with all of the blood flowing in or around the abdominal region so as to be ready for childbirth...don't think I didn't do research before making accustations. So naturally I feel bad for women in this sense, although I am still curious how that makes it normal to place your apendages in screaming hot water in the sink. Are women blessed with a tolerance to heat and an intolerance to cold? If I recieve 2nd degree burns from using the sink after a female uses it, am I the one with problems? Which brings me to why women have to use body heat to warm themselves up. I am definately not warmer than the water that comes out of that sink, so what is it that makes me a likely candidate to put a stop to cold hands and feet? Then if I don't succomb to the death-cicles known as my wife's cold hands and feet, should I feel bad? Are her feet emotionally cold as well? When I yelp in shock like goofy from a disney movie, is that supposed to put a smile on my wife's face or should she feel bad for the shivering and now pale body formerly known as her husband. Here is a question for all of the mom's, wives, daughters or whoever you are, why do you think you have so many little booty socks and slippers and things of that nature? hint: it has to do with men's intolerance for death-cicles. Think of what presents you have been given in the last couple of years...anyone?
On a more funny note, Joni talks and giggles in her sleep. I felt the kind of joy you feel when you figure out the meaning of life. I would have laughed harder if it wasn't 3am. For her sake, I hope that these two phenomenons are not related because if they are, then she is the devil.
Maybe that explains the realism to some of my "bone chilling" nightmares. Don't worry mom, I don't have nightmares.

One Fast Buffalo

As requested, I have replaced the devil picture with something cheery and holiday-ish.

I'm on my way out but I just thought I would add something to the blog that made me giggle a few weeks ago. I was in the Baylor research library and I went to look something up on google. Everything that had been previously searched under the same beginning letter popped up under the "search" box. Out of pure boredom I ditched what I was doing for a while and typed in all the letters on the keyboard to see what other people had searched for. I was laughing so hard I decided to write some of them down.

• inability to gaze upward
• tea causes much urination
• one fast buffalo
• smooth quill ostrich boots
• fanny bag joe
• full quill ostrich boots
• how to title a term paper
• nutmeg liver
• eskimo in diaper

So... thats that.

Alli is a CUTIE pie

Shon left for his mission in Detroit.

It looks like that is all the photos Blogger is allowing for the moment!

It was great to see all our friends and family for all the holidays, even if it was a bit of a puke fest in Ashton we still know how to have a good time, right?! Love you all.

Joni

Run in with the Police

I coudn't pass on this gem. I stand by our pledge long ago to not let any bad pic go unseen. I look like an enormous egg headed zombie and Joni looks like...Joni...after falling on her head too many times. The more I look at it the more I want to delete it. I couldn't find any pics of police to go with my story so this will have to do for now as a bad mug shot.

Last week I was the key witness to two police reports in two days at two different jobs. My co-workers make fun of me now because I am always the first one to be on the scene when something happens. One guy went as far as saying, "When Jesus comes he's going to come to you first so that you can tell everyone about it." I thought that was pretty funny, more in the way he said it than anything else. Anyways, I hesitate saying anything in case I am called in as a witness in court...but who is really going to read my blog anyways? Rhett, I am still wondering about the FBI and blog-reading? I always wondered who those people were that made millions from suing a company for the most rediculous things...I met one the other day. I won't go into long and boring details but this lady "claimed" to have slipped and fallen and broken her neck. I did everything I was supposed to do, I got her a blanket, and talked to her to keep her mind off of what was going on until the ambulance arrived. She even asked me to move her and I refused by saying that I wasn't going to touch her. Her act was good enough to be on the "young and the restless". She was moaning and shaking, and saying that she was just trying to finish Christmas shopping, but she had a bag of gutter screws and a placemat in her hand and she was in the lumber section. I could just see the whole christmas miracle in my mind...."Daddy, here is your 2x4 that you have been asking for, I hope you like it". She even took a break to answer her little pink cell phone when it rang. Now before you start judging me and thinking that maybe she really was hurt, the fireman got there and when they saw the whole situation they started joking around and pretending to fall...when she wasn't looking of course. When the paramedics got there, they couldn't see anything wrong with her, and were caught off guard about what to do at first. Sure enough, she was carted away on a stretcher. I'd hate to see her face when she realizes that Lowes won't foot the ambulance bill. It is only a matter of time before a laywer shows up. I am learning how different life is in a big city, not only because of the larger percentage of idiots and wierd people, but how often you have to trust your instincts. Thieves are everywhere here too, and I am getting a lot of experience learning the ways of thier trade.

The other police report wasn't so funny, which is why I won't go into it. But I was pretty disturbed and affected by the whole situation for a couple of days. Don't worry dad, I don't need therapy, it's just crazy when bad things happen to people you know, and even crazier when people you know do horrible things. Joni and I have learned a lot while here about being extremely cautious and aware of your surroundings. I will never leave a door unlocked again, or not look around before I get into or out of a car. We have talked about what to do in almost every situation so we feel pretty prepared for anything, but it is always good to be safe no matter where you are. If we would have stayed in Utah we probably would have continued to take for granted our safety. We never used to lock our doors or anything, but now we know how dumb that was to think like that.

I am about finished with my grad school applications and I will update you all when I hear something, we have some big decisions to make in the next few months pending the results of those applications. I STILL BELIEVE in the Broncos but things could quickly change if they lose to the Cardinals this week.

D O N E !

Well I am still alive, I guess thats all that really matters. I made it through the seminar and actually managed to stay calm and cover all the points I had planned on (this is rare because my my goes blank at the drop of a hat when I'm nervous). It actually went really well. Yaaaaaayyyy!!!! Just thought I'd give you all an update.
Love, Joni

Stingy nostril, research and pandora

I am really sick of sorting through my foot-tall pile of research - I've been at it since 9am and it's 6pm. Eeewww. So I am distracting myself for about 30 min and taking a break. My seminar is Thursday and all was going as planned until I woke up yesterday with a soar throat and a freight train running through my head. If my voice goes just in time for the seminar well... that will just be funny.
I should have known I would pick up some virus or another because I have been in 3 different childrens hospitals in the past 3 weeks with sick (but cute) little kids.
Whats really annoying one nostril is runny and stingy. At least the other one is in good shape for now.
You guys should try out my favorite web page. It's called pandora and you can put in a song or band that you like and it will create a customized radio station that play songs that sound like the one you entered. It's totally free and you can create as many radio stations as you want.
I wonder if I can add a link. http://www.pandora.com/
Oh I hope that works - if not just search for pandora.com and it will come up.

Okay, back to the fun stuff! Love you all.

JONI

Arctic Blast

I could not resist a blog about the latest event that has taken place in Texas. Yesterday it was 80 degrees and I was wearing a t-shirt and shorts, and today I took a picture of snow! It really isn't that big of a deal, but the big deal is how big of a deal this is to people here. I tried to wait to take a picture when the snow looked the heaviest, and you can barely see the snow on the cars...there wasn't even enough to stick on the ground, but this is where the story gets crazy.

The news channels were calling this the "Arctic Blast" and with how much coverage there was on it, they might have well given it a name like they do hurricanes, like arctic blast Pedro or something. Seriously, I don't remember seeing this much coverage on a single event since 9/11. From the early morning hours until late tonight, most of the shows have been canceled or been interrupted with emergency updates on the snow situation. One news station showed live coverage of the sand trucks coming into town and they were the "exlcusive" station to be able to follow the sand trucks around the city with live footage of the trucks dumping sand on the streets. The story gets crazier. All schools, major businesses and universities, and pretty much every building (except Lowes of course) in town told employees and students that work and school were canceled. There was not a drop of ice on the roads, let alone enough snow anywhere to warrant canceling anything, but sure enough...everyone was advised to stay home. I couldn't help but laugh out loud when this one news guys was literally bundled up with three inch thick fleece all around his neck and head, heavy winter gloves, and a wind breaker over the fleece. I have really had to bite my tounge because I don't want to be the guy who says "well this is nothing compared to where I am from", but seriously, this is crazy to a point that it is really funny. I had heard rumors about winters here and how everything would shut down, but it is another thing to actually experience it. I can't count the number of times I had to literally dig out my truck with a shovel in Logan to get to school on time, today I scraped the window with a credit card and everything in town was shut down.

I can't wait until after next week because I will hopefully get my wife back from Baylor. She has been on loan to them since she started the internship in August. She is freaking out because her huge seminar in front of all of the doctors and important people in the hospital is on December 7th. This is the biggest part of her internship, or at least the most stressful. She has been working on it tirelessly for months. It is crazy to think about how much students have to do to prove themselves worthy of a good job or certain certifications these days. Joel of course comes to mind as well when I think of that. I am excited for Sunday, I switched schedules with someone for my Sunday night shift in order to catch Cutler in his first start against the Seahwawks, Go Broncos!

Challenges and famous people

Hope everyone had a great Thanksgiving, I am nursing a mild turkey hangover today. I have had turkey sandwiches every day since last Saturday and last night was about all I could handle. Plus, we ate with a bunch of Joni's friends and thier families last night and I think the Martinelli's might have been alchohlic. I didn't think anything of it because I never really liked the taste of Martinelli's sparklling cider, so I gulped it down to get it out of the way, then Joni told me later she thought it was spiked a little bit. Does Martinelli's even make alchoholic cider? If so...ooops...maybe that is where my headache this morning is from. Consider this my confession even though I didn't know.
So I officially feel cool at 24 Hour Fitness now. The other day one of the main guys from the show "Prison Break" came in to work out. And I found out that former Forty-niner and Cowboy pro bowler Charles Haley works out every day there. It is funny to see famous people in person, it is kind of exciting at first, then you realize that they are normal people too, and it is wierd.
Joni and I teach the 6-7-8 year olds in primary as opposed to the 10-11 year olds...which leads me to a quick "venting" session. I know I was a little misbehaved but this is just plain cruel. The two craziest kids in primary are in our class. One little girl named Hannah is in a wheelchair, she is really sweet when she wants to be but she throws a lot of fits and you have to keep her entertained all of the time. I think she also has cerebral paulsey. Last week she ended up tearing apart our visual lesson, but at least it kept her quiet and busy for 5 minutes. The other tough one...and I mean TOUGH to handle...is a boy named Isaac who also suffers from a disabilty of some sorts. He wears diapers and jumps up and down and tries to run away every 5 seconds. He loves to scream loud and spit and hit too, and he isn't small, he is a thick and strong little guy. We have never been more physically drained after 2 hours then we were for our first day. It is one of the most challenging callings I have ever faced and I thought it was going to be easy. I seriously don't know what to do, we need two people to give all of thier attention to these two kids and one other person to teach the poor kids who are trying to pay attention amid all of the chaos. I feel even worse for Joni because I work two Sundays a month. Everyone kept saying they were acting up because we were new, but with my job there will be a sub in there with Joni twice a month. I know everyone is going to tell us, "it will be good in the long run and rewarding" or that "maybe we are being prepared for something" but come on, I get a headache just thinking about going back on Sunday. Okay, enough of the venting...for now anyways. I need a major attitude change or an "uplift" of some sorts to get through this one. Maybe I am just mad because the Broncos lost again. Plus I just wrote an e-mail to some guy who works for the Denver Post who wrote a negative article about the Broncos...it was actually pretty fun to do...I heckled him a bit. Hope everyone is enjoying thier time off, Happy Holidays!

Early thanksgiving

We had a pretty eventful week the last couple of days. Joni and I drove to Houston to have our Thanksgiving a little early with some friends and I wanted to visit Texas A&M in order to get a better feel for the place before I apply to graduate school. Joni likes taking pictures in the car, I can't help but wonder what people were thinking when flashes kept coming out of the windows. The Texas sky really is beautiful, I don't know if it is the humidity that makes a difference but there are literally layers and layers of colors. It made me think of that retro painter guy with the afro because he always painted the sky like that but I always remember thinking he painted his own little make believe-land or something, not real sunsets. I was very impressed with Texas A&M, and I was treated very good. They had two graduate students waiting for me when we got there to take us on a tour of the place and answer all of my questions, then they led me to a professor and advisor's office to learn more. All in all it was a very positive experience, the campus is ENORMOUS, I met some professors and students, and I am excited about applying. I don't want to get my hopes too high in case I don't get in, but I think we did the right thing by checking things out first.

Of course we thought this sign was hilarious. We were trying to figure out how they came up with the name...any ideas?

The food came out delicious, Joni and Amanda made thier first Thanksgiving meal ever and did an awesome job. They made everything look like it was right out of a magazine and it tasted even better.

I took my turn at trying to make the little whopper turkeys, they came out a little retarded...as was the little zip lock bag I was using.

It really felt like Thanksgiving, football was on all day, and we were able to spend time with friends. The feast included citrus herb turkey, mashed potatoes and gravy, deviled eggs, candied yams, stuffing, green beans, rolls, cranberry sauce, and of course...pumpkin pie. It was fun to see friends and experience a little bit of Houston, and it was great to be back home in Dallas. Joni went at it again with the camera in the car because the Dallas skyline downtown was awesome as we drove in, but the pictures didn't come out. No animals or people were harmed in the picture taking process...except the turkey of course. Texas is starting to feel a bit more like home for us...at least for now...I guess thats what a thanksgiving feast will do for you wherever you are.

My life as an actor

I was thinking the other day about something my mom and I talked about a few years back and for some reason I have never forgotten it. I thought my brothers would be interested to know(if you already don't) because it is another one of those questions that is really random but interesting. The question was, what actor do you think most fully portrays your life or the lives of those close to you? I recently read about a couple who did something similar except they asked each other what famous person would they like to play them in a movie about thier life story. It was funny because the wife asked the husband who he thought would be a good fit for him, and he thought about it and said, "Dennis Quaid, and you would be Reese Witherspoon". The wife thought for a moment and said, "if you are Dennis Quaid then I am playing myself". I guess it was funnier when I read it because it was on one of those airplane magazines and I was really tired. But anyways...Joni and I are too much the same as you probably know by now because she has always been as random as me when asking questions, but it really makes for an interesting conversation. Here are some examples: What are five features that you would HAVE to have if you built or bought a house? what 3 cd's would you keep if you could only listen to those 3 the rest of your life? what inanimate object could you not live without? etc, etc. It really helps you to get to know someone better than the typical "where are you from" type questions. It was funny because when Joni and I started dating, I don't know if I knew much about her as far as personal history goes, but I knew what foods she craved, and what the best skittle combination was. I think we both just really like asking questions that make you think and that can bring out your personality. The questions never seem to be answered directly, but a funny story will always ensue. I can't wait to ask some of the primary kids some of thier ideas because kids have some of the best answers...by the way we have the 10 and 11 year olds. I still remember at Glen and Kendi's wedding Joel and I had to sit at a table with all of the kids twelve and under...I about peed my pants when Joel asked them what they thought about world peace.

Back to the main question...with my mom and the actors question, this is what she said( and let this answer the question-does mom have a favorite?... you tell me): Steve-Nicholas Cage. She said it was because of his wry sense of humor but I thought it was really because of the hairline thing along with the ever present 5 o'clock shadow. Glen-Tom Hanks. I had to wonder, does Tom Hanks scrunch up in a ball when he laughs? Once again I thought it might be the hair. Joel-Harrison Ford. Who does mom have a crush on? you guessed it, the perfect manly man with a sense of humor that drives women crazy. For some reason I can't see Harrison Ford in a family circle talking about butt's and smells. And lastly, Paul-Kevin Bacon. WHHAAAAT? when I desperately asked for an explanation she told me the Kevin Bacon from Footloose...even better mom...am I spastic? After the initial shock I actually thought it was pretty funny, as are all answers to random questions. What is your take?

Halloween - a little late

So just when Paul and I think we've reached the height of our nerdiness, we take it one step further. On Halloween night Paul decided we needed to leave the house. He said it was because mobs of trick or treaters were going to break down our door & we wouldn't have enough candy... I'm pretty sure he just wanted that bag of Kit Kats all to himself. So we were walking out the door to see a movie and decided to throw together some last minute costumes. Well costumes are hard to come by when our belongings are separated in three different states but we did okay. In the end I was dressed up as Paul and he was dressed up as me - not to many other options, ya know?

I was quit funny to see people stare at Paul, obviously wondering if he was dressed up or just into bright colors and funny looking short bearded guys. We didn't make it to the movie we planned on but did find a cool little pizza place. It is called Piggy Pies (atta way to make a girl feel slim) and it was very yummy pizza.

So after dinner we rented a movie - that was cool and all but the funnest part of our Halloween was when we sat in the dark with a little light and made shadow puppets with our hands. Some of the coolest shadows?

• Elvis
• caveman
• cougar
• dog
• goose

You name it - we had it figured out. Anyways, I haven't done that since I was like 8 yrs old. I'm sleepy, gotta go! :)

karma

When I was a kid I remember hating church...maybe I only remember the times that I can recall throwing a fit, or never wanting to give a talk in primary (mom you'll have to enlighten me on that one), but I don't remember being the good little kid that loved to go to primary. I still remember Bro. Hand when I was in the CTR class because when I didn't pay attention he would squeeze my hand REALLY hard until I about cried. Another teacher in a different year came to our house to speak with my parents about how disruptive I was in class, I don't remember being that way but I guess I had to have been pretty bad. Then there was the traumitizing baby sitter and pre-school stories that Joel and I still remember to this day. I can never tell that story enough when our family left us for Mexico and the lazy babysitters made us eat water with our cereal, and Joel thought he was going to die of an ear infection and the babysitter told him to quit crying. In pre-school, Mrs. Jenkins asked me what kind of sandwich I wanted for lunch and of course I wanted PBJ like all of the other kids, but she said I had to eat a bologna sandwich or I couldn't go play outside with the other kids. I remember being strong enough to sit there at the table until Mrs. Jenkins left the kitchen...I threw the sandwich away and bolted upstairs to hide under the sink until my mom came to pick me up. Every time we went to her house to eat after that I refused to eat anything she made...she probably thought I was a spoiled little brat but I remember feeling triumphant that I stood my ground.
So maybe now you ask whats the point of bringing up all of the childhood trauma? Yesterday Joni and I were called to teach in the primary. We are actually pretty excited about it, but I can't help but wonder if God has a sense of humor and this is payback time. We don't know what age we will teach yet, but we will definately be sailing on uncharted waters this time. God really does have a sense of humor because after all those years of picky eating, not only did I serve a mission in which I had to try almost everything imaginable, but I married a dietician. So whatever it is that you think you may be getting away with in your life right now, just remember that someday karma will come back to get you...I have been watching way too many "My Name is Earl" rereuns lately. In the end, who knows, it may be the best calling I have ever had, at least I know marrying a dietician has worked out pretty good so far.

conversation

Word of warning: this may be a very confusing blog. Joni and I are very bored and it is midnight on a Friday night so we are going to try and have a conversation. I am the blue writing and Joni is the green. If this is as stupid as I think it will be, it should not be read...but we thought it would be fun to type to each other instead of talking (Joni just made that rule)...we are super nerds and not on any type of drug.

Hey Paul, what is your favorite slurpee flavor?
I definately like coke slurpees with a little bit of cherry flavor on the top, I hate mountain dew slurpees. I like slurpees...you want to go get a slurpee?
Um no Paul - remember how we just got back from 7-11 5 minutes ago and you bought a snickers icecream bar and I got chocolate? What is your favorite movie with an animal as the main star?
That is a VERY good question Joni (we don't usually say each others names like that every time but I feel like I am on stage right now). I remember lots of movies that my dad used to rent about dogs. I wonder if I was a kid growing up these days if I would like Air Bud...I used to like "Benji" and "Digby". I like lots of movies with animals...horses and stuff. What about you?
I'm not sure I've ever made it all the way through one. Does Gremlins count? Or Critters? Critters was scary.
Maybe like animal sci-fi, but not "animal". I remember when I watched "The Horse Whisperer" I lost 4 pints of blood from a bleeding ulcer, it made me not like that movie very much. What if that was the last movie I saw before I died?
Hmmm thats no fun to think about - how 'bout another question. What's your favorite skittle combo (choose 2).
I don't eat as many skittles to know what each one tastes like. I think I cram a bunch in my mouth. I could never eat one at a time unless I ate a whole bag and there was nothing else to do. This is a hard game. What smell do you like/dislike the most?
Oh good one! LIKE: After rain, oven smells like bread, apples.
DISLIKES: glue, dog breath, Gas passed from complete strangers in a line, gas that smells like food, any part of a group of single guys' house/kitchen/bathroom, vomit, used floss (at the dentist office where I worked and had to throw that stuff away - sick), coffee breath, and mechanic shops.
lol, maybe I should stick to yes/no questions. You'd think we would do really well at one of those newlywed games because our conversations are seriously like this, but I will have forgotten all of this by tomorrow night. Then Joni will ask me a month later what her favorite skittle combination was, and if I don't know, I will be in trouble.
Oh, and sweaty feet. But seriously about the skittles - red and anything (but orange) is great. And ANY three colors are good.
Sweaty feet is a good one, but what about sweaty feet with dirty bum? Sometimes when I am sitting at the computer after work and I take my socks off, mixed with my after lunch smells, I think I could pass out. What if it was someone else? I would die I think.
Okay, I think we could have all gone without hearing that. I still love ya though - stinky socks and all. Remember last week when I teasingly threw my post-run sock your direction and it hit you in the face? Sorry.
Yeah that was pretty mean until I got you back with my socks...I win. What has been your favorite thing about Dallas?
Definately the veiw of the city when I turn the last corner headed to work. The trees clear and all the sudden you see all the tall buildings reflecting the morning sun. That and the brownie parfait at Baylor cafeteria. What about you?
I love the food.
Yeah, food.
lots to choose from
I bet no one makes it this far into the blog. Lets be done soon if you want.
What are you saying you don't want to talk to me anymore? because I could just leave and go to bed if that would make you happy. Would that make you happy?
I think this is a trick question - but I am tired so I'm going to sleep - I get to sleep in tomorrow. Yesssss.
Hey everyone! Joni sleeps with a teddy bear and he has a name. She also has a little baby blanket that she sleeps with...If you just saw Joni's reaction you'd think I am sleeping on the couch tonight.
No comment - I like my bear.
Isn't that a comment?
ah crap.