Thoughts from an expecting parent...future dad's view

So I had a wake up call yesterday. Since Joni first found out she was pregnant I think we've both been pretty excited. It's just not how I ever imagined it would be, I always pictured myself crying when I first found out I was going to be a dad and then reading a baby book all the way through because I was so excited...just doing the things an expecting father is supposed to do or that you see people do in movies. It's been weird to go shopping for strollers and think about baby names and all that stuff, but it wasn't until yesterday when I held a 2 week old little girl that the magnitude of this whole experience hit me. That thing that makes Joni's "tumor" in her belly grow each day, and that "kicks" my hand when I place it against her belly is a living, breathing, human with emotions that we will be responsible for.


I think everyone imagines having a perfect, healthy, beautiful child. I always imagined a cute little blonde girl with curly hair, but that's about as far as my thoughts have taken me. Am I ready for this? We haven't even enrolled in a class and we've really just lived our lives the same as we always have. Everyone says "you'll know what to do" or "everything will be allright", but then they smile at me without saying anything and I know they are thinking "you have no idea what you are getting yourself into". Will I still dry heave when snot comes pouring down their face, or when they have a poop explosion while we are waiting in line at the grocery store? I don't think I will ever be able to "bare-hand" a booger like I've seen some parents do.


We were at Babies R US the other day staring at the strollers and this couple must have known exactly what we were thinking. The big macho husband who looked like a college linebacker said "you totally have to get that one, the ease in which the car seat comes in and out is fantastic".
Upon further inspection I noticed this macho frat boy had a full blown Abercrombie & Fitch shirt full of baby vomit, and he didn't care in the least bit...I followed his advice and I was actually excited to have a stroller.

Joni's belly this week...

So here's the deal if you want to know what its like to be an expecting father for the first time, not saying I'm an expert, just a few thoughts:

1) Understand that your wife will be going through a lot of pain, insecurities, and emotions that will be new to her and you will not be able to understand in the slightest. Just listen and be supportive.

2) You will find that there are bathrooms in public places that you never knew existed. In fact, employees will go out of their way to walk a pregnant woman to these secret hideouts.

3) Feeling the first kick is not what you would expect, it feels like she just has a stomach thats hungry or gassy.

4) There is a lot of psychology and thought that usually goes into choosing a name, but when it comes down to it, its just a name and you may be surprised about what names you end up liking.

5) You will most definately be surprised as you see her eat things she has never eaten, and hate things she has never hated. Some of the most delicious foods become nauseating to her.

6) She can smell you making a peanut butter and jelly sandwich 2 rooms away.

7) Her feet and back ache more than usual, so don't think its an "excuse" to be rubbed. In fact, just don't ever think anything she says or does is an excuse if you want to survive through the night.

8) If you see her not wearing her wedding ring don't be offended, because when you see what her one-time-loose wedding ring does to her finger you'll understand.

9) She will cry more...'nuff said.

10) I always wondered deep down if I might feel different about my wife when I saw her pregnant and going through so many physical changes. I still think she is absolutely beautiful, and she definately has that glow.

So I guess if I've made it this far, I think I can make it to actually holding my own child...I think. For now I just have no idea what that will be like, but I don't think it will be like anything I could possibly imagine.